God really is so very faithful, isn’t he?
no matter what this all turns out to be – i’ve grown SO very much and i’ve learned SO much about myself and how incredible the people that God has put into my life are.
i’ve been praying for peace and understanding. and patience. and last night i talked to my God about humoring me because sometimes i am scared. i sheepishly asked Him for a real tangible sign. i asked him to reveal himself. <3 i told him that i’d really appreciate it if he could lead me, in a very tangible way, to the scriptures that HE would tell me to read. i asked him to call me. because that would be so very great. and a really incredible and powerful testimony.
he delivered. in a way that i never EVER even considered.
i came home from grocery shopping this afternoon with a carload of food and an overtired three year old with whom i’d pumped full of sugar via a berry icee from costco and cookies from albertsons in a last ditch attempt to bribe him into being quiet and happy and kind. i was a wee bit stressed. as i pulled in i noticed i had a couple of boxes left on the porch.
i unloaded the car and swore to remember to grab them… but i didn’t. my little dude kept at it. he wanted more. more jellybeans. more sugar.
i needed just a breath of air away from the madness of tantrum-town. so – i opened the front door and stepped outside… the boxes! i had totally forgotten due to the brutiful joy of motherhood. 
i swooped em’ up and brought them inside.
huh. interesting. so i cracked em open. and this, friends, is what i found:
two. big. giant. jugs.
my first thought was – why in the eff are these crazies paying the big bucks to MAIL ME BIG JUGS?!
then i cracked em open…
*tears*
they were full of love. and my favorite FAVORITE candy. <3 my sweet friends had answered my call out to God for a real, tangible answer to reveal himself. he did it through my friends. you see – it’s not just about you and God… though that, too, IS important. it’s SO much more than that. it’s about the people you surround yourself. the people HE puts into your life. and it’s about some amazing women making jokes and writing love letters and telling me that i’m enough. and that they love me. and quoting the exact same scriptures that i’ve been reading outloud to myself and God. and that everything – no matter what – is going to be ok. the big jugs held my “tangible” answers – straight from my sisters in Christ – on what scriptures HE would have me read.
i’ve never cried the ugly cry when i’ve received a gift. but seeing these heartfelt outpourings of real tangible love straight from God and my homies was – incredible. and overwhelming. i’m so grateful. <3
there are no words to express my gratitude. this is one of the top five moments of my life where i felt so very loved. and safe. and enough.
as i poured over their sweet words, crying, i was humbled. and blessed beyond measure. shocked and in awe. and so comforted and loved.
i grabbed the very last carefully placed letter in the “big” jug and this is what it said:
tomorrow are the biopsies for benny, joon and the groupies. TOMORROW. and i’m worried and scared. and i asked God to reveal himself to me – and THIS were the last words out of the jugs. i cried. grateful, happy, blessed tears.
to the two of you – ohmyheavens. there are no words that accurately describe my love for you. i can’t believe that you took time out to send the big jugs. how incredibly thoughtful and meaningful. it’s one of the very BEST gifts i’ve ever gotten. EVER. even though there are many miles between us – i felt you here. and God. so whomever came up with this idea – know that you’re implementing it and it arriving in such perfect timing and with such powerful contents was, and is, very much “a God thing.” i love you guys like sisters. thank you. so so soooo very much.
i asked grant to take a photo – he was worried because i was crying again… LOL. it’s blurry (but that’s probably good. i had been ugly crying… LOL)
and… you should know – the big jugs found their permanent home on top of my fridge. where i will see them everyday. the contents are now safely in a box with my most prized possessions.
the hubs arrived home and was all… “what’s with the big jugs?”
i can’t wait to tell him. all about you. and God. and this incredible gift i will treasure forever.
thanks guys. i love you so very much. <3 well done good and faithful servants. <3
::big jugs::
